Finding Me: What did you want to be when you grew up?

As a small child, I had it in my head that I was going to be a teacher when I grew up to be an adult. I didn’t know what I would teach per se, I simply decided I’d be a teacher. I was a voracious reader back then. There was nothing better than sitting with my favorite Dr. Seuss book, listening to the rain’s pitter patter on my window, whiling away the days. As I grew a bit older, I learned the joys of creative writing. I excelled in my English classes; indeed, there was nothing better than reading and writing. I decided I’d be an English teacher.

As a middle-schooler, I played in the school band. I loved it. I still enjoyed reading and writing, but band music was in my blood, too. I had it in my head that I would be a band teacher, and that was good enough.

Upon entering high school, I joined the band and eventually made my way to the choir. That class was where I really had it in my head that I would be a CHOIR teacher. It was my destiny — my calling — to teach vocal music to high school students. I was smitten with the natural high I got every time I stood on those steps to sing, and I wanted to share that with others.

It was my intention to attend a local university, one which was known for its music program. I never made it. Poor choices in high school prevented me from attending the school and I was devastated. Feeling like my dreams would never be realized, I became frustrated with myself and basically checked out of my life. Eventually, I enrolled in another school. I was hoping to work through my general credits and then, if I decided I wanted to move on to another “music” school, I’d make the change. Life got in my way, though. I became pregnant with my son, my first child. At 22, I quit school and went back to work so that we could afford to care for a child. I thought this the way it had to be.

Now, my son is ten years old, and he has an eight-year-old sister. I’m a 32-year-old single mom, who uprooted from Colorado to start a new life in New Jersey a couple of years ago; I work full-time in Corporate America, and I’m still trying to decide what I really want to be when I grow up.

Once again, it’s writing that brings the most happiness to me. I think I have it in my head that I’m going to be… a writer.

Yes, I do believe I’ll be a writer when I grow up.